If you want to know about computers then I am definitely not the person to ask. It is tempting when you don’t understand why something has happened to blame the machine. This is when a piece of work or perhaps a computer programme doesn’t produce either what was intended or is of no use whatsoever. It would be wrong though to blame the machine.
If what comes out the other end of a process like a computer programme is garbage to borrow the American phrase, then as I understand it the probable cause was the garbage that went in at the beginning. Hence the phrase “garbage in, garbage out.”
What has that got to do with developing resilience? Good question. Every single day we have conversations going on. I don’t mean the ones with other people, I am talking about the one’s you have with yourself. We all do it I use the term self-talk to describe it. We all talk to ourselves.
The question is what are you talking to yourself about?
In crisis, challenge and stressful circumstances it is important to think about things that are going to help you. You can only change what you control.
What in the middle of this crisis can you control?
You cannot control much of what goes on around you, but you can control how you react to it. In terms of developing resilience it is crucial that you monitor what you are stuffing into your mind and to make sure that you put yourself into environments that lift you up.
One way to develop resilience is to focus on what you think about and how you think about it. Negative thoughts come from thinking about things in ways that are negative. For example, my son is not just late, something bad has happened to him. We can catastrophise without any evidence. Rather than focus on the negative focus on the positive, it’s possible he just forgot the time. When negative thinking occurs train yourself intentionally to come up with other positive options, you will be surprised at what you come up with.
Be careful what you listen to, watch and read. Obviously you cannot cut out all bad things particularly at the moment. Generally though, what lifts you up, what drops you into the pit of despair? If it’s not clear where the path is to lead you out, you need only work out what the next step is that will move me to towards resilience.
I believe focusing on what you can do and not what you can’t is a one step. Thoughts govern actions. If your actions are not helping the answer is to change your thoughts.
Next week what can you do about the environment that will lift you instead of drains you?