I came across a new word, “farrago” which means a confused mixture. For example, you might have a farrago of doubts and fears, hopes and wishes. Often our minds are a confused mixture which has to do with with the way you think. As a coach I help those I coach get the clarity they need through asking powerful open questions. Wisdom dictates that the quality of your thinking is directly related to the quality of the questions you ask yourself.
Our education system is woefully inadequate in this sphere. You and I have been taught what to think but not how to think. This is to our detriment. The quality of our thinking has a direct relationship to bringing clarity and therefore focus. When your quality of thinking is better, recognising that whatever you focus on expands, your focus will be clearer leading to better decisions and outcomes. When you have such clarity, you are better able to communicate your ideas and plans to others.
In past blogs I have emphasised the importance of maintaining a sense of curiosity – keeping that child-like questioning mindset that looks to better understand the world around you. Asking questions is only half the story what about the quality of those questions?
As a culture we place great value on knowledge. On more than one occasion, I have heard it said that knowledge is power. This sounds like answers are the most important thing. There is no denying that having solutions is desirable, but the quality of those solutions depends on the quality of the questions being asked.
“It is not the answer that enlightens, but the question.” Eugene Ionesco
You may remember that some time ago I mentioned this little thing in our brain called the reticular activator. Those who study these things believe that this is the component in our brains that helps us fulfil our goals. It’s because of the reticular activator that when you decide you are looking for a blue Volvo estate as your next car you suddenly seem to see them all over the place.
What are the questions you are asking yourself? What questions are you being asked by those that you trust to coach you? Why does it matter?
3 Questions which Unlock Better Understanding
The questions you ask frame the information that we will filter.
1. What can I learn? In every situation, or event you can ask this question. It doesn’t matter whether it was a negative or positive experience, the question will frame your response.
The questions you ask that are of sufficient quality will begin to mine the depths of your unlimited unconscious mind. Here resides the potential inside each one of you. The flawed thinking you have is that if you work harder you will get the success you are after. The evidence is that this is not the case. If you are to succeed, then you need to act and think differently.
2. What can I do differently? This follows on from what you have learnt. Changing things changes the outcome. You cannot get a different outcome unless you change something.
What ultimately decides whether you fulfil our potential or not is the beliefs you have about your potential. Those beliefs drive your decision making at a sub-conscious level. If you are not satisfied with your current reality, then continuing to make the same unconscious choices day in and day out will not change it. To change you must become aware of what is going on in the way you think about things.
3. What limiting beliefs do I hold? To grow and gain in confidence you must lay down those beliefs which are getting in the way of your fulfilling your potential.
You all have them tucked away in our unconscious mind. By asking the right questions, often in the hands of a skilled coach, this thinking can be made visible and at that point it can be changed which is the key to getting rid of the obstacles that will change your reality.
“Until you make the unconscious, conscious, it will direct your life, and you will call it fate.”
Carl Jung
A good coach helps asks you questions which bring you clarity contact me at mark@smartculture.uk to discuss how you can fulfil your potential.
Photo by Ronan Furuta on Unsplash
